Concept: Taking Risks

This guy told me that you should just say the things that are on your mind. We live in this constant state of inhibition for fear of the way that people may or may not respond. And I tell everyone but the guy that I like that I like him, and everyone but the girl that I’m mad at that I’m mad at her and that gets me nowhere.

It’s terrifying to think about bearing your soul to people.  Today, through a long discussion, I learned that I am absolutely terrified of being rejected. When people have hurt me, I just LET them hurt me because that’s so much easier then them leaving me.

It’s so easy to say, “I deserve better.” It’s so easy to know that you are of value. However, it’s not easy to implement such feelings. It’s not easy to think that someone wonderful will like you back because you’re wonderful. It’s so much easier to believe that you are just not good enough.

I’m trying very hard to tell people how I feel. At minimum, I’m starting with honesty. No, I may not be ready to march up to a boy and profess that I think he’s absolutely adorable. But when someone asks me how I feel,  I can tell them.  

I feel happy.

I feel overwhelmed.

I feel scared.

Start telling people how
you feel. When people look back on their lives, I’ve never heard anybody say,

“I regret asking out the beautiful girl,”
or
“I regret standing up for myself against that person.” It’s the opposite. You only regret what you don’t do and don’t say.

Rejection terrifies me. And that’s okay. I love that. I love that rejection terrifies me because I know why it terrifies me. My ex boyfriends rejected me. My old friends rejected me. Boys reject me. Girls reject me. And I love that because that makes me who I am today and I am proud of who I am today.  

The whole point of this post was that it’s okay to be scared. It’s okay to be unsure or unhappy or not be able to tell people how you feel. But start with honesty, and see where it takes you. And take a small chance every day, and then when you finally risk something big it will be worth every second.

Concept: Loving Yourself. This blog will inspire you to feel a bit more confident every day. All words and pictures are original. Copyright. Contact author for pictures or quotes before using. I love you. You are worth it. Have a day that connects your body, mind, and soul and leaves you feeling respected, loved, and happy.

Concept: How to be Super Happy when you're Super Single

I wrote a letter to my future boyfriend telling him about all the things that my ex boyfriends did to me. This, of course, is a letter that is given to no-one because I'm not currently dating anyone. However, after writing about my ex boyfriends, I realized just how OKAY it was that I wasn't dating anyone.

With Valentine's Day coming up, there's a lot of pressure on some single people. Some people feel the need to have sex, others are sad that they're single. It's all very natural, and if you feel this way, don't put yourself down. Sometimes it really sucks to be single. You may miss sex, or cuddling. You may miss dates or nights in. There's a lot of things that are great about relationships.

But there are a lot of things that are great about being single too:

1. You can find yourself.

People have laughed at me, multiple times, when I have said this. Finding yourself has turned into a concept that is ever so silly. However, I have found myself through being single. I learn about things that I love to do. I know I love to write and make movies. I know I love laser tag  - especially when i'm wearing my batman onesie. I know I love hot chocolate and mayo on chips and I know that I love these things entirely on my own. And I'd love to share these things with someone one day, but for now I adore the fact that I love these things. So. Take this time to find things you love.

2. YOU HAVE TIME

Relationships take up a lot of your time. That's wonderful when it happens, but use all the free time you have to do something wonderful. Make a film. Join a pottery class. Learn to bake. Dance. Use this time to find new things that thrill you.



3. Learn what you want to love.

It's easy to say yes to every person that asks you out. But, you can use this time when you're single to reflect. Think back on what worked for you and what you hated. Think about what you're genuinely looking for in a human, and then don't settle. I know that I want someone who is a total geek, but still has ambition. I want someone who takes charge and is spontaneous. I want someone, most of all, who RESPECTS me. And believe it or not, that's incredibly hard to find. But, I refuse to settle for someone who doesn't have these beautiful characteristics because I've settled in the past. Use your singleness to your advantage.

4. Spend your money on yourself

I bought myself a camera. And I bought myself earrings. And movie tickets. And good food. I'm dating myself. I know what I want, and treating myself always makes me feel better. Allow yourself treats! You DESERVE it!

5. There is nothing wrong with being single.

Just remember this. There's nothing wrong with you. You are not too fat, or too ugly. You're not too loud, or too quiet. You are not too dumb, or too blonde, or too anything. You are absolutely wonderful the way that you are, and the right person will see that and cherish you.

This Valentine's day, go out with your friends. My friends and I have very cute plans, and I'm SO excited for them. Enjoy yourself, BE SO HAPPY YOU'RE SINGLE! And if it feels sad at the end of the night, enjoy the 70% off chocolate tomorrow.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Concept: Loving Yourself. This blog will inspire you to feel a bit more confident every day. All words and pictures are original. Copyright. Contact author for picture or quotes before use. I love you. You are worth it. Have a day that connects your body, mind, and soul and leaves you feeling respected, loved, and happy.

Concept: Living with Anxiety

Concept: Living with Anxiety 

 

In modern society, it is not unusual to have anxiety. However, as sad as it may seem, it IS unusual for an individual to know how to manage their anxiety. First and foremost, many people don't even realize they have anxiety. These days, the amount of pressure that is placed upon young adults is overwhelming. The cost of college alone is enough to make someone snap. However, now young adults are being more affected by anxiety in deeper ways. I am one of these young adults - I have severe anxiety. But I'm doing just fine!

You may be asking yourself, Hmmm do I have anxiety?  

If you're questioning it at all, there's a chance you have mild anxiety at minimum. Here are a few questions to add some foresight into anxiety:

•  Do you think everyone is always mad at you, even if they're not?

• Do you spend hours going over fights or conversations in your head to figure out what you said 'wrong?'

• Do you have panic attacks about tests, quizzes,  grades, etc?

• Do you have a hard time going to parties because the idea of meeting new people scares you? 

• Does conflict make you feel sick? 

If any of those questions resignate with you, you may be suffering from anxiety. BUT HAVE NO FEAR! I'm here to give you an insight on how to deal with it. 

 

First, let's start with how to tell others about your anxiety. Here's some dialouge that may be helpful : 

"This made me uncomfortable, can we talk about it?" 

"I know this may seem irrational, but this is how i feel..."

"I'm sorry, big events actually stress me out. I'd love to meet up with you sometime one on one though."

"I need to know you're not mad at me. If you could just confirm that, I'd be able to relax. Thanks!" 

BE UPFRONT! It's 100% okay to have feelings, but when you keep those feelings locked up, then your anxiety gets worse. I know the concept of throwing your emotions out there is one that stresses you out, but if you open your heart and mind to the idea, and take a huge leap of faith, it will be so much healthier for you in the long run. 

 

Aroma therapy is incredible helpful. Candles, scents, etc. I have an herbal spray that goes on my bed every night. It helps calm me down a lot before I go to sleep. I also drink a TON of tea. tea is incredibly calming. Vanilla tea works best for me - find what works for you. 

When you start to stress out, take a deep breath. take a looooong deep breath and count to 10 before you react. This helps you think and make rational decisions. 

Maybe you don't have anxiety, but someone you love does. Here's some helpful dialogue: 

• "It's okay to be stressed out. Let's talk about WHY you're stressed out and see what we can do to tackle this together."

• "I understand that you are sad/upset. Would you like some tea and then we can watch a movie?"

• "I get that you don't like parties, but this one means a lot to me. I promise I will stay by your side, and won't leave you alone."

• "No, I'm not mad at you. New rule, if I ever am mad at you, I'll tell you, this way if I haven't said it, you know I'm not." 

• "Take a few deep breaths. Let's start there"

• "How do you feel?"

Because I live with anxiety, I know how hard it is. I know that sometimes you just feel like you can't get out of bed. I know that sometimes picking up the phone to order dinner stresses you out. I know that sometimes you feel like crying for no reason. This is okay. This is normal. The best way to start healing and helping yourself is to find what works for you. Do you need alone time? Do you need a hug? do you need tea? Do you need burger king? What's your go - to? What makes you feel beautiful...What makes you feel calm? What makes you feel okay?

List of things that will help at any time:

• Tea 
• Counting to ten
• Taking a few deep breaths
• Smiling even when you're sad 
• petting an animal
• cuddling with a stuffed animal
• calling your best friend
• hugging your parents/loved ones
• eating your favorite food
• taking a well deserved nap
• reading a good book
• laughing with a child
• watching a funny movie
• treating yourself 
• hot chocolate
• warm sweaters
• random dance party
• trying something fun and new

If you have any questions about dealing with anxiety, please comment or ask me! Have a wonderful week my loves.

Concept: Loving Yourself. This blog will inspire you to feel a bit more confident every day. All words and pictures are original. Copyright. Contact author for pictures or quotes before using. I love you. You are worth it. Have a day that connects your body, mind, and soul and leaves you feeling respected, loved, and happy.

 

Concept: Sex

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Concept: Beauty

Concept: Beauty

"Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder"

 In modern society, we often stigmatize the concept of beauty to a skinny young girl with a lack of breasts and a certain 'Je ne se quoi' quality that drives men up the wall and makes all women jealous. Let's start with: those women are beautiful. They're probably all wonderful women as well. I am not here to tell you to hate on those women, or think of them as any less beautiful. However, I don't think we should have an ideal. I don't think the concept of beauty should be defined by such specific standards.

First and foremost, let's tackle the idea of 'young'. Why is it that women are seen as beautiful until they reach a certain age? My mother is one of the most beautiful women i've ever laid eyes on, and clearly she isn't twenty-two anymore. My grandmother is an absolute goddess. Let's tackle women such as Meryl Streep and Betty White. Those women are a religion to me, they walk in an essence of beauty that inspires me to be a poised and graceful individual. Those women are beautiful. Age doesn't make you any less stunning, it simply changes beauty from one form to another. Young skin is replaced with old. This is a fact. However, this isn't a travesty, a loss of beauty, an aspect of life to cry over. Instead, it is simply a new form of beauty. A beauty that comes with the changes of life, with the new roads that you walk to reach the end of your journey. No road is lesser then the one before, they simple ARE.

Now what about the concept of skinny? I have never understood why the real concept isn't 'healthy?' there are a copious amount of diets and fads that are all about 'trimming away the fat.' However, the real concept should be: hows your BMI? Are you drinking enough water? Have you walked a lot today? Furthermore, so many looks are beautiful, so many curves are stunning. There is no 'right' weight. Eliminate the idea that you have to be skinny to be beautiful. And for the record, this isn't just for women, it's for men too. Eliminate the idea that you have to be muscular to be attractive. Eliminate the idea that you have to have abs to get laid. Eliminate the idea that in order for women to like you you have to have the perfect body. Just drink water. Be healthy. Do you. Girls, embrace your curves. Love your stretch marks. Adore you freckles. Hug the extra five pounds. Kiss the lack of a thigh gap. You are a GODDESS. Men, hug your stomach. Appreciate your thighs. Wink at your arms. Love your double chin. You are a GOD. There is no ideal. You create your own standard.

Lastly, let's discuss the concept of having a "quality" to make a romantic interest like you. If you want to look a certain way, I support you. If you want to be a certain way, I support you. But do it for you. Don't do it for any man. Don't do it for any woman. True love is when someone loves you despite your flaws. True love is when someone loves you when you are at your worst. Be you. You are enough. Someone will love you. Don't worry about that. If it didn't work out in the past, it simply wasn't meant to be.

Concept: Loving Yourself. This blog will inspire you to feel a bit more confident every day. All words and pictures are original. Copyright. Contact author for pictures or quotes before using. I love you. You are worth it. Have a day that connects your body, mind, and soul and leaves you feeling respected, loved, and happy.